Wednesday, 12 February 2014
I hope you don't wait for Valentine's Day to show him/her how much you love and care for them. Everyday should be an opportunity to do so. Here's wishing you lots of love, happiness and prosperity!!
Saturday, 8 February 2014
Half the time we walk with wide grins on our faces, pretending that everything in our universe is okay or indeed perfect. We laugh out loud at lousy jokes, choose our words carefully, and wear beautiful clothes. And if you are a woman like me you spend hours at the beauty parlour having your hair fixed and your nails polished.
We may do this because we really care about one another's feelings and about our looks, but sometimes it's because the thought of having a hair out of place or being seen as 'that' terrifies us. Even though our worlds are falling apart, and are far from perfect, we walk with our heads held high, looking people in the eye, convincing them that we have everything under control. But inside we are like a volcano, waiting to erupt.
A little prod on the right spot is all it will take for us to explode, destroying everything in our path. It is when this happens that those around us turn in awe, wondering what the hell happened. They are puzzled why a woman or a man of such a stature and human decorum could snap and lose it like that. Well, I reckon it’s because human beings don't allow themselves to be vulnerable!
For me to understand human vulnerability is to draw from my own life experiences, and perhaps experiences of others. Making yourself vulnerable takes a lot of courage and may be the bravest thing you've ever done. As human beings, we want to be accepted for who we are, warts and all. And yet half the time we hesitate to reveal our true selves to another human being. The thought of being rejected or being judged terrifies us. We hide instead of coming out in the open.
But being vulnerable implies the opposite. It means loving someone with all your heart even though there is no guarantee that they will love you in return. It’s not being afraid to not be perfect and revealing your true self, warts and all, giving them the choice to fall in love with who you really are and not who you think they want you to be. It’s taking that leap of faith as you go after that which your heart desires.
Being vulnerable is looking someone in the eye, confessing your deepest fears. Standing in front of someone, admitting your wrongs and asking them to forgive you. You can’t always tell how you will be perceived after that, but it is trusting that they will appreciate your effort and gesture regardless of the outcome.
Have you ever had to shed tears in front of someone? If you're anything like me, you probably have. Being vulnerable is crying in front of your pastor, your friend, your wife or indeed your boss without having to worry that they will think any less of you. It's being able to turn to someone admitting that you are hurting, you need help, you can't cope, and that you've had enough. It's letting them see you in your weakest state and allowing yourself to feel what you feel without fear of being judged or ridiculed.
I reckon if we all exercised a healthy amount of vulnerability, this world would be a better place. If only we could allow ourselves to be who we are, to feel what we feel, I believe there would be fewer, no suicides, abortions, resentment, pride, anger, frustration among other things.